With the impending closure of
Maya's Mom, I spent a big chunk of the day yesterday going through my journals. I plan on transferring them to my BabyCenter profile, not for any other reason than sentimental value.
Yesterday's review sealed my decision. Reading through them, looking at the pictures, and, especially, reading the comments brought up so many varied emotions.
First off was
happiness. I usually journaled about upbeat occasions since I'm not one to excessively complain or exhibit negativity. I smiled and chuckled, even rolled my eyes a few times, at my happy-go-lucky attitude.
I did feel
sadness too. I think there were only a handful of entries where I let myself enter a pity party.
I felt
flattered. My friends' comments, regardless of content, were abundant.
I was
amused. Those comments were funny, clever, appropriate, and, some, snarky. Gosh, I heart snarky!
Above all was nostalgia. All the journals were successful in carrying me through a wormhole to a point in past tense. There I felt why the urge existed to write each one of them, to share myself, my life, my children, and my husband with the MM community. I relived everything I wrote about, I knew again how it all played out. I knew the pride, the elation, the sorrowfulness, the loneliness, the togetherness. I knew me, and I knew you.
I never thought I'd be writing journals, up until I joined this once wonderful gathering of parents in March of 2007. Sad as it is that MM will soon be no more, I am forever grateful that it exists and I am part of it. I found some amazing, beautiful, extraordinary friends there. Your and my journals were part of what started our relationship.
(I don't like getting sentimental and mushy, so I've already deleted a few sentences here that were overly steering that way.)
xoxo
